Katherine

Misty, age 32 

 When I found out I was pregnant with Katherine I knew that I was going to have a natural birth no matter what. My first three babies were all born with the assistance of an epidural. I felt so strongly that I needed to do this without pain relief and began searching for the method right for me. I decided to use the Bradley method because it encouraged my husband to be my partner and coach in the process. I also loved how simply it explained childbirth and relaxation techniques. Because I live in a small town I had no access to assistance from a midwife or way to take natural childbirth education classes in this method so I ordered Natural Childbirth The Bradley Way book from amazon.com and my husband became my coach. 

We prepared well together. We practiced all the exercises and I learned to relax my entire body. Learning to relax has always been difficult for me and following their methods helped me in many ways during the 9 months of Labor. Especially in my ablility to sleep at night. Out of 4 pregnancies this was the only one that I was able to sleep comfortably up until the day I had the baby. 

 So…on with the birthing story… Before the labor began I preregistered at the hospital. I sent in a note with my paperwork stating that I did not under any circumstance want an epidural. I didn’t want to meet with an anesthesiologist, I didn’t want the nurse to tell me it was time for an epidural. I just wanted no talk of one in my room. They were amazing nurses and no one brought it up…not once. They were very supportive. Excluding the fact that I have been contracting for weeks and quite ill for the last week of my pregnancy this was the easiest labor and delivery I have ever had. My husband and I spent most of the labor joking and talking. It was actually a relaxing experience and I never would have thought I could say that. My first 3 experiences with childbirth where extremely long and painful deliveries! I just needed to learn to relax. 

 After contracting all night on Wednesday, all day on Thursday, and into Friday morning I called Labor and Delivery because I was experiencing quite a bit of bloody show with the contractions. The contractions were very strong but I was able to relax through them. After visiting with them for a few minutes they asked me to come and be checked. I was actually upset they wanted to see me. My contractions were tapering off. They were only coming about every 5 minutes and the intensity was not as strong as I thought they should be. I went in and found I was dilated to a 4-5. That was shocking to me! I am usually admitted at a 2 or 3 and in so much pain I am begging for an epidural. Labor and delivery decided to observe me for an hour. I was upset because I only had about 10 contractions that hour and they were wimpy. But I kept walking around, squatting, etc. and resigned myself to the fact they would send me home until the contractions came closer together. I was emotional and crying a bit because I wanted to have my baby. The doctor came and checked me and informed me that I was a 7. I couldn't believe it. The contractions weren't painful enough in my mind! Actually they weren't consistent, hard, long or following any pattern...but they were working and I was relaxing through them as I should. My husband and I frequently joke that I relaxed the contractions away. I probably did! 

I was finally admitted at 6:00 am on Friday morning. With a smile on my face I began the work I prepared myself for bringing my baby into the world! I took a picture of myself at a 7 and sent it to my mom. I remember just thinking over and over "See me! Smiling! Happy! Almost done! What the heck?" I had a really good labor coach (my sweet husband) and apparently The Bradly Method really works... The scary part of the labor was ahead for me! It took me 4 hours to contract to a 9 and after another 3 hours I was still at a 9. It had been too easy. My really nice contractions were not quite enough to get the baby out so they gave me a very little bit of pitocinn. I didn't like that at all but I knew if the baby was going to come out I needed some help with the contractions. They also broke my water at that time and the pressure was so intense and the urge to push just overwhelmed me. (I wouldn’t let them break my water earlier because I knew it would make the contractions much more difficult) The doctor quickly came in to check and they discovered why I wasn’t progressing to a ten. The baby was turned face up…so the doc got to put his hand inside and turned her around. The moment he put his hand in to turn the baby I thought I was going to maybe die and the tears and nausea began to flow. It took a few contractions for me to recover from that before I could focus and push. For the next half hour the pain was intense. Yet it was amazing to be able to feel the baby as it was time to push. It was also great that I was able to run my own show. I had studied so well I knew exactly what my body needed and what was going on. It was invigorating. 

From this point on Relaxing was getting more difficult and My husband said that I kept sobbing that I should have got an epidural over and over. He kept responding sweetly that all I needed to do was give it a good push and our little baby would be here. He was right and after I finally convinced myself to push really hard little Katherine began her final descent. . A few pushes later and she was out. Beautiful little thing. I sure am happy I didn't give up and that my husband helped me stay strong to the end and not have any pain medication. I kept my eyes shut the entire time I was pushing and when they placed her on me I finally cracked them to see my beautiful baby was a girl. That was a pleasant surprise! With no epidural recovery was fast...with all the labor practice and preparation there was no tearing. (This was a first for me!) I didn't even swell after birth. I was a little shaky but I could walk around the room, go to the bathroom on my own and best of all I could take care of my baby without being stuck to the bed. With the best labor coach in the world there were no tears or stress and he even helped me through the last hour with all one could wish for in a husband/coach. The nurses were so supportive of me having a natural birth! They joke about how some women can just come to the hospital and give a baby as if there was nothing to it. Apparently that is me. Good thing they didn't witness the other three long painful labors I have had. I like the reputation I have here. 

1. When did you decide you wanted to deliver your baby naturally? As soon as I found out I was pregnant with #4 I told my husband we were going to have her natural. It just needed to be that way. 

2. What reasons or factors went into your decision? After having 3 births with epidurals I just knew I had to do it. I had some odd things happen with the last two epidurals and I didn’t want to worry about those with this delivery. Plus I wanted to prove to myself that I could master the pain and bring my baby into the world naturally. I wanted to understand how my body worked and see for myself what an amazing experience natural childbirth was. 

 3. What did you do to prepare for natural childbirth? (midwife, classes, methods, books, etc.) I wanted to have a midwife when I decided to go natural but I moved to a small town where they didn’t have midwifes or classes. I did contact an instructor for The Bradley Method via email and she answered my questions. My husband and I read, studied and practiced the exercises in the book entitled Natural Childbirth The Bradley Way. 

 4. What was the hardest part of your experience - before, during, or after childbirth? The hardest part was the last 30 minutes. The contractions were intense and I was terrified of feeling the pain of actually giving birth. 

 5. What was most helpful to you during labor to help make pain from contractions manageable? Breathing, relaxing, having my husband by my side reminding me of how to relax and let the contractions do their work. 

 6. What do you wish you would have known going into delivery? This time was number 4 so I was really prepared. When I had number 1 wish I would have known how to relax fully and let my body do the work. It made all the difference! 

7. Is there anything you would have done differently? Nothing…except I wish I hadn’t cried for an epidural at the end. I didn’t get one…but I wish I would have stayed a little tougher. 

 8. What did you feel were the positive benefits to your natural childbirth - were the benefits what you expected? It was empowering to feel the process that my body went through to bring Katherine into the world. The benefits were above and beyond what I would have expected. It was educational, wonderful, exciting. I just absolutely LOVED it! I loved that all the work I did educating myself and preparing myself really paid off this time. 

 9. Is natural childbirth something you recommend to other mothers, or something you'd do again? I think so. I realize that every delivery is different. I felt very empowered this time and happier than I have ever felt before at the end of a birth. But it took a lot of studying, practicing and emotional preparation to get to that point for me. I think you have to be really strong and really determined to make it work. If you aren’t willing to work for it then it isn’t going to be successful! 

10. What advice do you have for other mothers interested in natural childbirth? Read everything there is on the internet about natural childbirth. Watch movies of other natural deliveries. Be prepared. Find a method that works for you and stick to it. The Bradley Method worked for me…if it doesn’t work for you for you find something that does and stick to it. Relaxation is the key. When you are relaxed your body just does the work for you

Ethan

Angela, age 25
2008


Only fourteen months after giving birth to our first child, Lia, I was pregnant again. At 19 weeks along we learned a little boy would be joining our family. At a prenatal visit two weeks before his due date I was already dilated to a 4. My midwife was sure I would have the baby before my next visit. We scheduled the next appointment, just in case, but I left laughing with excitement that I would have a baby well before then.


To back up a bit. With my first pregnancy and delivery I went to an OBGYN. I delivered at a hospital that has a high rate for epidurals and over a 17% C-section rate (one of the highest in my state). My doctor seemed very supportive of my desire to attempt a natural birth. But when the time came she was not the doctor on call and I was not supported by hospital staff. If not for my wonderful husband Mark and doula Gina, I believe that delivery would have gone very different (i.e. I would have had a lot more meds!) After my first delivery I now had the confidence that I am capable of a natural delivery and desired to have a positive support team around me. I looked into Midwives, home deliveries, birth centers. My husband was supportive of a natural delivery. He thought it was amazing. However he did not feel comfortable being away from a hospital. I was getting quite discouraged until I learned that a hospital near me had a midwife group that delivered at the hospital. Hurray a compromise, we both win. I personally still wanted a birth center or home birth but did not want to worry my husband and understood his concerns (even if I did not share them). 


 I met with the midwife group at the hospital and loved them! I was pleased that there were only 4 midwives and I would get to know all of them throughout my prenatal care. So when delivery time came I would know the person there to deliver my baby. Unlike the OB I went to who had 18 different OBs in her office. I had never met the doctor that actually attended the delivery of my first child. I would prefer to have the same midwife the whole time but at least this was a big step in the right direction.


Back to labor. Well the next appointment came and went. I was now six days past my due date. For three weeks I had thought, "any day now!" I did not go through this with my first pregnancy. My daughter had surprised us and came a week early. I had not gotten to that point of "I Can't Take this Anymore!" I felt an overwhelming urgency to get this baby out. I had seen my sister like this with one of her pregnancies and remember thinking "calm down girl, and chill out!" Oh I am so sorry for ever thinking that and now understood what she felt. Yet another appointment day had arrived and I told my husband to take the day off of work and come with me with bags packed because I was not coming home without a baby in my arms. I was going to have this baby today whatever it took!


11:15am we arrived at the midwife clinic. Tonya, a midwife, was shocked I had not had the baby yet. She asked me how I was doing and if there had been any progression or contractions. I was very emotional and started to cry. I told her I can't take it anymore. I had not had sleep in days. She checked me and stripped my membranes, again. Good news I was a solid 5cm and 100% effaced. She said that is far enough progressed to check me into the hospital. I pointed out one problem. I was not exactly in active labor, I had been dilated to a 5 for a week already and had not had a contraction since the last time she had stripped the membranes a week ago. As Tonya felt my belly she noticed that they baby seemed sideways, like he was not straight up and down like he should be. She explained that if his head was not in the right spot that could be a reason for contractions to start and stop like they had been. She massaged my abdomen a bit and had me roll over on my other side. She said she was trying to encourage baby to move so he would be pushing on the cervix better. I then asked her if I should go home or get checked into the hospital. I could scarcely bear the thought of going home. But I was worried to be induced with Pitocin or have my water broken. Tonya recommended we go out for lunch and power walk around the mall or hospital. I wiped my tears and said okay.


We drove a few blocks from the hospital and stopped to eat at a little cafe. I walked around as we waited for our food and nothing. Not one contraction. My heart sank. I sat down to eat. Nothing. We finished up and headed out to the car. Nothing. Mark waited while I decided what to do. Go home and wait it out or go back to the hospital to be induced. Finally I wanted to call my sister. I knew what I wanted to do, have the baby, but I really wanted someone else to tell me it would all be okay. That inducing was not so bad... I called my sister (who was taking care of Lia) and went over everything with her. She listened and asked a few questions but still I knew it was my decision. No one was going to tell me what to do. Next I called Gina, our doula, who was waiting to hear from us if she needed to head to the hospital or not. I told her all that had happened (or not happened) after the appointment. She asked me a bunch of questions but like everyone else made it clear it was my choice how to proceed. I look back at this and just have to laugh at myself. I was so distraught. Well after having my hopes up to have the baby early for weeks and now be a week late it is very emotional. I wish I could have just calmed down. The baby eventually has to come out but really I had this unnerving feeling it had to be that day. That it just could not wait any longer. So I finally made a decision to go back to the hospital and begin Pitocin.
1:30pm While walking through the hospital toward the maternity ward I had a contraction. A fairly strong one. I let my hopes sore for just a moment. Maybe I'll start on my own. 30 min later and nothing. We got checked right into a room. Since I had just had an appointment and Tonya had checked me they took me straight to a delivery room. While our nurse was busying herself about the room I had another contraction and it is pretty intense. I ask her if she can wait on the Pitocin for a while. I wanted to see if these contractions would pick up. If I don't have Pit then I don't need an IV, which I really didn't want.
3:00pm Gina arrives. Mark, Gina and I go walking. After our first lap around the maternity ward contractions really pick up. I felt exhilarated. Labor was progressing on its own! Contractions were 2 1/2 min apart and good and hard. 4:00pm nurse asks me to come back to delivery room to be monitored for a few minutes. Baby was doing great, and I was fantastic. I felt like I could run a hundred miles with the adrenaline coursing through my body.


4:15pm Gloria, my favorite midwife from the midwife group, comes in to check my progression. 7cm, 100% effaced, -1 station. Gina suggests getting into the bath. I thought that sounded great. 4:27pm in bath tub. Mark rubbed my feet. My favorite songs played softly in the background. Gina turned out the lights and sets up a handful of lights that look like candles (hospital doesn't allow open flames of course) and I felt so peaceful and wonderful. Gina showed Mark an awesome trick. She gave him a plastic cup and told him to pour the hot bath water over my tummy. It felt so good.


5:05pm contractions become stronger and closer together. I felt like I was drifting off into my own world. Gina and Mark where amazing at keeping me clam, relaxed and letting me know if I was tensing at all. At first they would tell me to loosen my shoulders, or take a deep breath. Then it got to the point that one of them would softly touch a tight muscle and not have to say anything, just by their touch I instantly focused on relaxing that muscle. In between contractions I would sink into the water but when I felt a contraction coming on I would get up onto my knees or stand up so Mark could squeeze my hips with his hands. That helped tremendously during a contraction (another invaluable tip from Gina).


5:40pm All at once the bath was not the place I wanted to be. I had the urge to walk. In my fuzzy state of mind I somehow communicated to Mark to help me out. As I stepped out of the tub I remember focusing on the length of the room and knowing I had to cover that distance NOW. Before Gina could even get a towel around me I was dragging Mark across the room. We paced the room for a few minutes. It felt so good to walk, and walk fast. The nurse asked me to come to the bed side to monitor baby for a minute. I desperately wanted to walk and the whole time I had to stay by the bed was not pleasant. As soon as she was finished monitoring baby I wanted to walk. At the same time I felt incredibly sleepy and could not keep my eyes open. I closed my eyes, laid my head on Marks shoulder and clung to his arm as we walked back and forth, back and forth. It felt like one big contraction. It would flare up to be very intense and then lesson a bit but would not go away completely. Mark later told me I was practically running across the room. He was having a hard time holding me up and keeping up with me. I just remember feeling like the more I moved the better the pain felt. I know that is a strange way to describe it but the pain really did feel good at times. I would swing between "I can't do this" to "wow that feels strangely gratifying".


6:05pm Baby gets hiccups. Everyone, including me, found it cute and comical that a baby would get hiccups minutes before being born. Silly guy. His hiccups where so strong you could see my whole belly move.


6:15pm Still pacing the room I suddenly felt pushy. We began discussing where I wanted to push. Getting on the hospital bed seemed awful to me. I wanted to keep moving. My nurse put up the squat bar on the bed (I didn't even know they had those) and Gina showed me how to squat next to the bed. Gloria the Midwife checked me one last time. The bag of water was still intact, and she suggested to break it. I was apprehensive and asked Gina what she thought. Gloria and Gina both explain if my water is broke I'll have the baby right then. I say, "Wait, you mean I'm ready to push? But it hasn't gotten hard enough yet. This is it!" I couldn't believe I was there. Delivery was minutes away. This was so different from my first delivery. I had prepared myself for the long haul of pain I experienced with Lia.


6:24pm Gloria the midwife says I still have a little rim of the cervix left and I'll need to push past that. She instructed me to bare down on the next contraction and push. She says it may take a couple of pushes to do this. I felt another contraction coming and I push. Oh the relief. Once again, like with my first delivery, I felt the incredible sensation of pushing. Yes it hurts, but it's like my body is getting a much needed breath of air. Like I've been building up to this moment to push all my life. All at once during that first push I heard my husband (who is supporting me while sitting on the floor next to me) say, "BABY BABY, I see a HEAD!" I then saw Gloria fly across the room and just as she reaches me I deliver his head. I hear her chuckle and say something like "so much for pushing past the cervix, he is here." My contraction was still going so I took a deep breath to bare down and push. Gloria calmly says, "Angela please stop pushing, I need you to get onto the bed on your hands and knees." There was no alarm in her voice, she was her calm cool collected self she always is, but somewhere in me I knew something was wrong. I literally jumped up (with a baby head hanging out) and landed on my hands and knees on the bed waiting for further instructions. I thought at the time Mark, Gina or Gloria had helped me up. I can vividly remember the feeling of hands under my arms lifting me. But later they all said I got up before any of them could reach out to touch me. I know someone helped me, an angel perhaps, I know I did not do that on my own.


6:25pm Gloria, again very calmly, explains that the baby is stuck. Shoulder dystocia. She explains that I need to listen to her very carefully. She will guide me on how to push, when to push, to move positions and so on. I later found out what she had me do is called the Gaskin maneuver. And it worked beautifully. At 6:26pm I fully delivered his shoulders and body. Gloria helped baby as he slid out and then gently laid him on the bed directly under me. I then sat back and scooped up my new baby boy into my arms. Someone wrapped a blanket around us and I had my little guy all to myself. At that moment I looked up and for the first time noticed the crowd of people in the room. When Gloria had realized there was shoulder dystocia she had called in the NICU and as I lay there holding my baby I realized many people still had a very worried look on their face. Gloria calmly told me to just keep holding him while she finished with me and the nursed checked out little Ethan while he lay on my chest. I remember how awful all the after labor stuff was from Lia's birth and I had mentally prepared myself for it this time. Gloria announced that I had not torn one bit. Amazing, I tore like crazy with my 8 lb. baby but not one bit with a 10 lb baby. But I could still tell something was wrong. Finally taking my gaze away from the sweet baby I was nursing I asked what was wrong. Gloria coolly told me I was hemorrhaging and she was a little worried. For the next 25min things were a bit intense. I could see the strain of worry on Mark's face. I started to feel very weak and asked if someone could take the baby. He had stopped nursing and I didn't feel like I could hold him any longer.


A nurse took him to weight him and do another baby check to make sure all was well with him. We all found out why he got stuck. He was HUGE. Weighing 10.4 pounds and 21 inches long (a full two pounds large than my first baby) he had a huge head and very broad shoulders. The nurse checking him also noticed he was not breathing great and a burse was forming on his shoulders. The next day x-rays confirmed that both collar bones had been broken during this fast delivery. Poor little guy. But the pediatrician reassured us that, "those bones are meant to be broken in birth, and in two weeks it will be totally healed. You'll never even know they had broken." But for over a week after birth I could tell he was in pain and uncomfortable.


Finally my bleeding slowed and the atmosphere in the room relaxed. I was okay, baby was hurting, but going to be just fine. That was the first time I realized why I may have had that urgent feeling that he needed to come that day. Any longer and he would have been too big. Gina stayed for hours after the birth, rubbing my feet, talking with us. We all talked about how different this birth would have been if I would have had an epidural. I would have been flat on my back pushing which makes the cervix smaller, and not able to feel how hard or where I was pushing, and most important not able to move around as I did to deliver him. Now that it was all done I was grateful to have a healthy baby boy. The first few days with Ethan in the hospital where also a bit scary. He had aspirated some fluid during delivery so was put on a feeding tube and oxygen. But being a big baby he bounced back fast and we finally got to come home.
As we came home I thanked my Heavenly Father for all the people who had assisted us in bringing another child into the world. God had given us another child to bring into our family. Truly a miracle. Again I learned some new lessons that I will take to my next pregnancy and delivery (if there is one that is).


If you would like to see a photo montage (my doula made) of Ethan's birth go here.


1. When did you decide you wanted to deliver your baby naturally?
After giving birth almost naturally (I had had some IV pain meds) with my first child, I decided this time I could do it totally naturally. The most frightening thing about first time delivery is just not knowing. Not knowing exactly what it is going to feel like, not knowing how long it is going to last, if I could endure. But once I had gone through it once I know this time I would succeed in natural birth.


2. What reasons or factors went into your decision?
The first time I delivered naturally it was because of a fear of epidurals (possible side effects and such). But this time it was because I knew I was capable of natural labor and delivery and I wanted the best for myself and my baby. It is hard to describe just why I desire unmedicated births. It just feels right for me and my children.


3. What did you do to prepare for natural childbirth? (midwife, classes, methods, books, etc.)
With Ethan I did not take classes again, but I did re-read all the books I had with my first pregnancy and a few more. My favorite new book I found was "Birthing from within" and one about Home Birth (but I can't remember the name of that one.) The best preparation I did was again having Gina for my doula. about a month before delivery she came to my home and spent a few hours with me talking about my first birth experience. What I liked, what I would change. And she showed me some wonderful videos about natural birth. One being "The business of being born" and another one that discussed and showed water births.


4. What was the hardest part of your experience - before, during, or after childbirth?
The hardest part was the 24 hours after birth. I lost a lot of blood and felt awful for about 24 hours. But once my body recovered its loss I bounced back fast. Especially since I did not tear.


5. What was most helpful to you during labor to help make pain from contractions manageable?
Meditation to stay calm and relaxed, the bath was wonderful, and walking was what got me through transition. Something I learned this time, that is so very important, is the people you have around you. It is amazing what a negative feeling coming from someone can affect you. And the opposite, a positive calm coming from people makes ALL the difference.


6. What do you wish you would have known going into delivery?
I wish I would have been more open to a water birth. I had just heard about them but was not convinced they were safe. Well it just sounded weird to me and I was getting used to the idea. Now that I know the water is my epidural I would love to attempt a water birth. I am definitely more open to that next time.


7. Is there anything you would have done differently?
I still would have loved to be at a birthing center or at home. Given the complications I had it was nice to be in a hospital where a blood transfusion was right there (I almost needed one, but in the end did not) and a NICU was down the hall (they did monitor Ethan but he never went there). I know my husband would have been even more worried once complications started happening if we had not been in a hospital. But when all was said and done my midwife and doula could have done all they did at a birthing center or at my home.


8. What did you feel were the positive benefits to your natural childbirth - were the benefits what you expected?
Where do I begin with the benefits? I believe things would have or could have been much worse if I had had an epidural. And after losing so much blood and to recover so quickly I believe it was largely due to a natural delivery. I am not a medical specialist and am not going to attempt to explain all the things that happen in a woman's body when giving natural birth (all the hormones that are released etc.) But I have read a lot about that in my research and encourage any pregnant woman to read books and talk to an OB or midwife or doula about that.


9. Is natural childbirth something you recommend to other mothers, or something you'd do again?
Yes and yes!


10. What advice do you have for other mothers interested in natural childbirth?
If it is truly something you want to do it is a must to surround yourself with people who not only support you but will help you accomplish it. And even if natural childbirth is not for you, know your options, know the risks you are taking with any decision you make. And be flexible in your plan. Going into my first delivery I knew I wanted to try natural delivery but if I would have had an awful labor, or been pushing for three hours I would have changed my plan. That is why it is so important to know your options. And the last advice I have is to have a midwife. OBGYN's are wonderful when things go wrong. But they are trained surgeons and that is what they do well. From my experience they are not trained in unmedicated deliveries. They may be supportive of you if you want to try that, but when it comes down to it they do not help you accomplish it. This has been my experience and I have heard a few stories otherwise. Hopefully things are starting to change.

Nola

Kelsey, age 24:
Fear of the unknown, this was one of my motivating factors in choosing to try for a natural birth. I am a planner and I like to know what to expect, especially when it comes to how painful something might be. The sensation of being numb is something my body abhors to say the least. For a longest time I figured child bearing wasn’t for me because I didn’t think I could handle the epidural and not having feeling in my limbs. That seems backwards, but it was how I felt. My mother had birthed 5 children naturally and even though she had never pressed me to do one method she was always positive about me having an un-medicated birth. Her example was what I held to for hope that maybe an un-mediated birth was something I could accomplish.

Friday Nov 13, 2009, I was 5 days past my due date and feeling fairly normal. My pregnancy had been smooth. I exercised by doing yoga and jogging throughout my pregnancy and I think this assisted me in feeling good. My mother was overdue with all her 5 children and I took that into consideration when I was told my due date. I figured this date was what I’d say to those inquiring of when I was due. This was not a date I would hold accountable for making me go into labor. I had been to a routine non-stress test earlier that week and everything looked great. I had a doctor’s appointment Thursday and was 80% effaced but only dilated to a 1. This meant I probably wasn’t going into labor soon, especially since I’d yet to feel a contraction, even though I was having them (as told by the technician at my non-stress test). After my appointment I even made one last run up to Park City to the outlets for some more baby shopping. While driving and shopping, I felt cramping in my lower back and thought this was because of the rather harsh pelvic exam I had earlier at my doctor appointment. No one told me that contractions could feel like menstrual cramps, if I had realized this I probably would have taken measures into my own hands and tried a little harder to go into labor on my own.

Alas Friday morning came and I was scheduled for a second non-stress test. My previous test took less than 45 minutes so I thought I’d schedule this test early in the morning. I didn’t eat a big breakfast, didn’t shower, I put my hair up in a messy bun, didn’t wear makeup and dressed in leggings and a sweater. Oh how I wish I’d known the events to come, breakfast and the shower might have helped. My husband had the car at work so I asked my parents if I might borrow theirs so that I could do my quick test and come back home. My dad is quite doting and said that since the weather was cold and I was alone, he’d be happy to take me. I tired to assure him that I was a big girl (quite literally) and felt confidant that the test would be quick and I didn’t need him to bother coming. Thankfully he really likes to take care of his daughter and he said he’d love to sit in the waiting area and do some work.

My test was the first to be performed that morning so everything was a little slower than I wanted. The major bother was the technician wasn’t thrilled that I was over due. I still don’t know why she thought this was abnormal, but she quizzed me endlessly why I had not been induced. I explained my mother was over due with all her children, my doctor doesn’t induced first time births till after 41 weeks, I wanted to go into labor on my own and the lastly I was trying to go unmediated and an induction can make that harder. She looked astonished that I was trying for an un-medicated birth and this is when the turn of events came. She pulled herself up to the computer monitor and said, “oh this isn’t looking good I’d better call your doctor, just plan on staying here and you’ll probably be induced”. I got nervous because I had heard stories about patients having pitocin to “speed things up” and I knew that this might be what hinders me from a natural birth. I chose to give birth in a hospital because I felt it wise since this was my first child and there were a lot of unknowns. I also knew that by doing this I’d be fighting the medically minded system. For a split second I contemplated running out of the hospital while the technicians back was turned. I really didn’t want to have to be induced, but it looked like that’s what she was set on me doing. I feel lucky my dad was with me so that I was not alone.

The tech came back and told me my doctor’s office wanted me to do another test for longer duration to see what the baby’s heart rate was doing during my contractions. They were worried because in the previous test her heart rate did take a slight dip and hadn’t fully recovered, but all of the other contractions were normal. She explained I would be admitted to a delivery room and monitored for an hour and then potentially I’d be induced. The doctor on call came to see me in the delivery room before I had even started the long non-stress test. He told me that I would likely be staying to be induced. Boy did I feel picked on in a sense because this really wasn’t what I had imagined. I had created a labor scenario and this wasn’t it. I took two classes, a Lamaze class and the other given through the hospital. Both stressed the fact that women come too early to the hospital. I was in the mindset to labor at home by taking a bath, blowing out my hair, doing my makeup and showing up at the hospital at the very end so as to be there the shortest amount of time possible. Un-medicated births in the hospital can be tricky because ideally the mother should be in bed, continuously monitored and unfed. These are all opposite of what can assist in natural birth. In my case it didn’t help that I was also to be connected to an IV for fluids and pitocin, which makes the contractions a lot stronger and less time between sets. The hour-long test finally ended at 12:00 pm and I was told it would be in the best interest of both the baby and me to be induced. My husband Jesse was still at work at this time, but I called him to tell him what was going on and that he should come to the hospital since they were putting me on pitocin. Luckily I had my bags packed at home and the car seat and other items were ready so Jesse went home, showered and brought all our things.

I kept telling myself that I should continue to let my wishes be heard to the nurses and my Doctor that I planned to go un-medicated even though I was going to be on pitocin. Since I didn’t know what level of discomfort I could handle I wasn’t sure if I’d reach my goal of an un-medicated birth. My yoga practice had taught me that there is much to the saying “mind over matter”. I started blocking out any negativity towards to me going un-medicated. I was going to be seeing by daughter within a few hours and I still had control, albeit slightly less than desired, over my labor. While I was being prepped for the IV, I read an email written by my dear friend. I had sent her a text early that morning saying that I was in the delivery room, but not in the ideal situation that I wanted. She has birthed two children and she knew that I preferred an un-medicated birth. I read her words of encouragement. She reassured me to not worry because God was in charge and He knows EXACTLY what he is doing, he hasn’t lost His footing and He is the only source of comfort during this time. She said to stay focused because my daughter is the prize and she will exceed all the feelings I’ve ever had in my life. Oh how this brought me right back on track. I realized I get to see my baby soon and that no matter medicated or un-medicated she’s what I get at the end.

I asked that my water wait to be broken till I was at least dilated to a six, this wasn’t’ what the doctor wanted and I was continually asked if my water could be broken before then, but from what I had learned while on pitocin it’s best to wait till you are fairly dilated so that the contractions don’t go crazy from the get go. I put my bed into a chair-like position and was fairly comfortable through most my contractions. I was doing so well that I urged Jesse to go to a class, while he was away I chatted with my mom and sister. Jesse returned from class and my family left so that it could be just Jesse and me for the rest of the labor. My dilation progress was slow even though I was on pitocin and fully effaced. The Doctor told me that if I didn’t progress with in the hour he’d likely have to do an emergency c-section. The baby wasn’t necessarily in any imminent danger or risk and I felt great, so this is when I mentally tuned the doctor out. The nurses had warned me that this particular doctor usually told his patients that he’d do an emergency c-section if they didn’t progress in a certain amount of time. I was glad that they let me know this so that I was prepared and subsequently whenever the Doctor came and was negative I just zoned him out. I actually couldn’t even talk to him because he just impeded my concentration. I gave him the thumbs up sign when he needed me to acknowledge something. This may seem so silly, but as far as I was concerned I was doing fine and the threat of a c-section wasn’t helping me in any way.

I was advised to lay down on my side to see if that could speed up my advancement. I closed my eyes, started doing some yogic deep breathing and squeezed Jesse’s hand during the contractions. I had Jesse talk to me. He did a great job explaining that the contractions were the method, which the baby could arrive. Jesse reminded me constantly that labor is a good process (he never said easy). Jesse told me about some of our happy memories to help me, relax and smile. He encouraged me by reminding me how exciting it is that we get to see our daughter. Jesse knows me so well he even gave me a good incentive by telling me I could eat whatever I wanted when it was all over. The contractions picked up greatly and now I felt like a deep throb in my lower back. They felt like strong menstrual cramps that come in waves. They were uncomfortable but with breathing and lots of pep talk from Jesse I took each contraction one at a time.

The cute nurse who taught our hospital birth class saw Jesse in the halls while he was getting ice for me. She recognized Jesse and asked if she could come to the room and say hi. She will never know what her optimistic visit did to help me. Since I had been laboring on my side, eyes closed, facing away from the nurses, doctor and monitor I didn’t really necessarily know how I was doing. I sat up when she came in and she was astonished to see me talking through contractions. She praised my efforts of doing what I wanted by going un-medicated and said that if I had made it this far then I shouldn’t worry, I’d do fine with the rest. This is all I needed to hear, even if it wasn’t true. I now felt great, like I could go the rest of the way and accomplish what I wanted. Just those few affirmative words were the ticket to helping me focus and feel confident. I can’t emphasize enough just how beneficial positivism is for a laboring woman.

The pitocin had slowly been turned up throughout my labor. I had hoped that things would pick up so I would not have to reach the maximum dosage, but I ended up needed it. I was checked and was only at an 8 and so the dosage was turned all the way up. Luckily the hardest of the contractions were for the shortest time. The nurses left us a lone for longer than normal and this is when I felt like maybe I couldn’t go on any longer. The funny thing is, even if I had tried there is no way I could have gotten up, hunched over and held still for an epidural. Just wasn’t going to happen. It took all I had to concentrate and breath through the contractions,

Finally I felt like I needed to push. I had read about this and never understood what people meant. Well, now I did. But it was just Jesse and me. The nurses weren’t there so I didn’t really know what to do. I told Jesse, I really felt like I needed to push so he flagged down a nurse, she checked me and finally I was fully dilated. It’s amazing how many times I have heard that the time when women think they can’t go on is actually right before they are fully dilated and it is the end of labor. Since this was my first birth and I hadn’t been checked for a while I didn’t quite realize this, but I was just like everyone else. It was 11:00pm and the nurses did the mad scramble to get everything ready. The Doctor came in, turned on the spotlights and explained to me about pushing. And I quote, “push like you’ve never pushed before, and then push some more”. A better indication for me of how I was doing was Jesse’s voice. He could see the baby’s progress so his voice would get really excited when I was making improvement. It was so fun for me to hear Jesse tell me she had hair. Yes, I was very concerned that she would be bald. For me pushing was magnificently better than the previous part of labor. I felt like something was actually getting accomplished and finally at 11:45 pm I gave my final push and I met my daughter Nola.

There might not be a better feeling than being done with labor, holding your newborn and not being pregnant anymore. To put it simply, I felt like wonder woman. I honestly don’t know if I could have done it without Jesse reminding me this was all worth it. I had the chance to hold Nola right away and she latched on and nursed fairly easily. Meeting your child for the first time is a huge thrill because you’ve bonded with your baby for 9+ months, but finally you get tactile and visual contact that solidifies your relationship. It’s like meeting your pen pal. You feel like you know them so well, even though you had never met. I was honored to be Nola’s mom.

When I was cleaned up, Jesse left with Nola to the nursery. The nurses weren’t use to a fully functioning patient and didn’t quite know what to do with me. Usually the mother is numb and they have to assist her and wheel her in a bed. I could stand and move fairly well. The endorphins were amazing. This was one excellent perk of un-medicated childbirth. Yes I was exhausted, but I didn’t have the linger side effects of an epidural. I ate, went to the restroom unassisted and could get in and out of bed on my own. I actually I felt so good it was hard for me to settle down and sleep. I spent the rest of the night bonding with Nola, resting and soaking in the reality that I accomplished something awesome and had become a new mother. No matter the method, childbirth is a miracle and an amazing achievement for both mother and father.

1. When did you decide you wanted to deliver your baby naturally?
I had always wanted to avoid a medicated birth, but I never new how I’d handle labor discomfort so I prepared myself for both natural and medicated. Throughout my teenage years I listened to those women who would tell their natural birthing stories. In high school when I had to watch the birthing videos I was moved by the women who chose a natural birth and I felt that this method was for me, it was what I wanted. Very few people ever encouraged me in my desire and this is when I doubted myself. When getting pregnant was an option I really started doing my research. I read, planned prepared so that I would be ready for whichever method I ended up using.

2. What reasons or factors went into your decision?
I don’t enjoy the hospital, the atmosphere of medical devices and the fear of the unknown. I figured that not all medicated births go as planned and I wanted to be prepare myself for a potential natural birth.

3. What did you do to prepare for natural childbirth? (midwife, classes, methods, books, etc.)
I tried to not let those with negative views sway my decision. I took it upon myself to search out information and form my own views. I took the hospital class to know what to expect when I delivered there. I took a Lamaze class through a birthing center. Read personal birthing stories and researched various birthing methods via the Internet. I read Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth, by Ina May Gaskin. This book has a lot of great stories. One of my goals for pregnancy was to exercise is some form throughout the entire pregnancy. Nothing vigorous, but by staying active helped me throughout my pregnancy, delivery and post pregnancy. I worked on breathing and visualizations and positive affirmations. Kegels. Healthy eating also aided me to feel good.

4. What was the hardest part of your experience - before, during, or after childbirth?
The unknown was the hardest part for me, I didn’t know how I would react to all the elements of childbirth and since it was my first I didn’t have prior experience to base any decisions off of. Worrying can be very hard on a soon-to-be mom but that is why I continued to prepare. I didn’t like that I was embarrassed to tell people that I was preparing for a natural birth and thus this made me doubt myself. I’m glad that my spouse was supportive 100% and was willing to prepare and learn with me.

5. What was most helpful to you during labor to help make pain from contractions manageable?
While pregnant I had tried to prepare myself mentally. Yoga was one of my personal helps because it is all about being in tune with the body. I relied on my husband to talk me through every hard contraction and we had been to a Lamaze class that taught different techniques for the husband to help alleviate pressure.

6. What do you wish you would have known going into delivery?
I knew that I’d find resistance from the hospital by wanting an un-mediated birth but I didn’t realize how difficult it would be to make my desires known all while being in labor. For me maybe having a doula or midwife would have helped make my wishes known so I could just focus on giving birth.

7. Is there anything you would have done differently?
Definitely, next time I will choose a doctor that I love and that will support and facilitate my un-medicated birth. Especially if it is a group practice, I will need to like every single doctor in the group so that I will enjoy whoever delivers my baby. I’d love to deliver in a hospital that supports other methods of birthing other than medicated.

8. What did you feel were the positive benefits to your natural childbirth - were the benefits what you expected?
My recovery was fairly smooth. I have a hard time dealing with numbness; so an un-medicated birth was excellent because I was able to attend to my newborn 100% after giving birth. I think I was very surprised to feel as good as I did.

9. Is natural childbirth something you recommend to other mothers, or something you'd do again?
I would definitely have another un-medicated birth and I hope to be an advocate of un-medicated births, yet I’d never want someone to feel like I disagree with medicated births. I support un-medicated births and I would love there to be more support for those who are seeking to have a natural birth in a hospital setting.

10. What advice do you have for other mothers interested in natural childbirth?
If a natural birth is what you desire, please don’t let the negative views of others make you feel like its impossible. I believe that husbands and wives should be able to achieve the type of birth they desire and not be swayed by others who may not even be educated in un-medicated births. Again, I felt like learning as much as possible was beneficial for me so I’d suggest doing research and preparation. There are so many great methods that one might fit you better than others.

Hayes

Emily, age 24:

Russ and I went to my 37 week appointment 1:30 p.m. At my 36 week appointment I was already dilated to a 4 and 80% effaced. We were so anxious to hear if I had progressed further, and Russ said a few times on the way there "I bet you're a 6 now."
He was right. The doctor checked me and confirmed that I was now dilated to a 6. The doctor looked shocked, I tell you, you never get used to that reaction. He and the nurse questioned me about my contractions. I told them, truthfully, I had false labor contractions the night before for a couple hours, and I thought I felt like what might have been a contraction waddling through Old Navy the day before, but I wasn't sure. Everyone says, "you'll know" and I didn't, yet.

The doctor said it was time to get to the hospital. He let me know that I also tested positive for Strep B and that it was imperative I get a treatment of penicillin before the baby was born. He said the treatment takes four hours and at this point we've gotta get down there and get it started. He told us to go home get our gear and to not take more than an hour because-- "that's one bulgy bag of water you've got in there." Three weeks early or not, Hayes was on his way.
Russ and I drove home to get our bags. He gave me a blessing of comfort, stamina, strength, and the will-power to do this according to my goal -- naturally.

At 3:00 we got to the hospital. The admitting nurse stared at me blankly... "So, you're not having contractions, but you're dilated to a 6?" Yeah yeah lady, I know, it's not normal. By 3:00 I had heard PLENTY of non-believers express the utter impossibility of it all.
They monitored my contractions for awhile... they were coming consistently but once again, they're standing there puzzled because I am sitting there smiling, talking, and cracking jokes and shouldn't I bet yelling like an Amazonian woman by now? They FINALLY start my round of penicillin, and tell me that it needs to run its course for 4 hours [4 - 8 p.m.] At this point I am dilated to a 7, and my water is still hanging in there.

By 8 p.m. the penicillin treatment is done. My contractions are starting to pick up on their own by now, but I had only dilated to an 8 since 4 p.m. I think we all knew this could take all night if I didn't get some pitocin. I know it was probably the worst decision for someone planning a natural delivery. But, every half-hour the nurse came in an upped pitocin until I was at 7mL, which is nuts, I should sue! Then in comes the Dr. with a crochet hook.

The moment my water broke, I felt what I had been waiting for: a crampy, wringing-out contraction. I had definitely had contractions before, but holy smokes, this is what "you'll just know" about. Time to start Lamaze breathing. For the first hour of full-blown contractions I felt pretty good, I was staying on top of them, resting in between, staying relaxed. Yeah, just wait a sec.

At 9:00 p.m. the nurse checked me and I was now dilated to 9 cm and 90% effaced.
The second hour of contractions are causing the worst pain I have ever experienced, thirty seconds at a time, each a minute apart. They are coming down on me like waves, every time I get pushed under and can't find enough time to come up for air before the next. I can barely hold my head up in between, I'm so tired. So, Russ holds me.
The baby's oxygen is dropping so they make me wear the mask.
I feel completely defeated.
Russ and my mom are saying "hee hoo hee hoo hee hoo." and I am saying "heehooahheahahoahaouchhh." I say a prayer.
After that, wiith my trusty coaches' help, I am able to breathe and relax through the rest of my contractions.

10 p.m.
BANG. Every muscle, bone, and vein in my body tells me it's time to push.
The nurse confirms that I am now at 10 cm then says, "The Dr. went home but I just paged him and he'll be right back."
As soon as this overwhelming need to push comes, there is really no stopping me now. The nurse says we can start pushing without the Dr. and at this point I'm like "Who? Give me the stirrups!" Every time I feel a contraction coming, I hold my breath and push my heart out. Finally, after two hours of helplessly breathing through contractions, now I get to put my back into and actually do something about it, and I love it!

With every push I feel mounting pressure, but it's the most amazing feeling in the world! For the next hour, it's three rounds of pushing per contraction and then literally gasping for air.
My mom sees his little head first and I feel like a million bucks. I know I can do this, and we're all so ready to meet this little guy. At this point I am totally owning this push-fest. In fact I own this whole room, this hospital even, I am on a serious high. I've got a group of nurses watching my every push, and they're all cheering me on. I know what a good push feels like, and I know what a useless one feels like. If I don't get a good push in, I make myself do an extra one. [If only I had this motivation at the gym.]

After the quickest hour of my life, finally Russ catches a glimpse of Hayes' face. The Dr. says "Stop Pushing!" At this point I don't know if I can, my body is doing all the work, I am just guiding the pressure it's creating. I figure out a way somehow and then he says "Push now! Hard!" and I hear a cry.
Russ is sobbing and can barely see to cut the cord, but he does, and Dr. lays Hayes on my chest and I feel like I've known him forever, and he is mine!

From that moment on Hayes swept us away. We are so caught up in him and his crazy arm flails, his toots, his big beautiful blue eyes, and his ear-to-ear smiles. Every moment I look at Hayes I am reminded that God lives, and He loves us. I know deep and intense pain, but I also know that there is opposition in all things. Every moment of pain made room for me to be able to feel the equal and opposite in love and joy.

I know it is not the popular choice to have a baby the way I did. In fact, I was told that only 1% of hospital deliveries are natural by choice. But, it was a choice, and I am so grateful for the people in my life that supported my goal from the beginning.
So, was it worth it? Absolutely. But, not because it was a natural delivery, because I don't think that one way is better than another, they're simply two different choices. But, because it was for Hayes. And I've come to learn real quick that I would do just about anything for that little man.


1. When did you decide you wanted to deliver your baby naturally?
It was always something I wanted to at least try, I really committed to it when I learned I was pregnant.

2. What reasons or factors went into your decision?
I realized that I needed to be prepared for any kind of delivery, I knew if I didn't try it with my first I probably wouldn't with my subsequent deliveries. And after a nasty reaction to meds during my wisdom teeth removal, I didn't want to stress about how I may react to medications during childbirth.

3. What did you do to prepare for natural childbirth? (midwife, classes, methods, books, etc.)
Lamaze.

4. What was the hardest part of your experience - before, during, or after childbirth?
Transitioning. Contractions at 9 cm with pitocin is trying. It really is true though, as soon as you're ready to throw in the towel, you're probably ready to push.

5. What was most helpful to you during labor to help make pain from contractions manageable?
Having my mom in my face basically forcing me to follow her breathing patterns. I was holding my breath and tensing my shoulders otherwise, which doesn't help.

6. What do you wish you would have known going into delivery?
Nurses and doctors don't exactly weigh options with you. They choose what they think is best, and you better be on your toes if you want something else. Always ask "What are my other options?"

7. Is there anything you would have done differently?
Being inexperienced, I didn't realize how much pressure I put on my husband and mom to help me through, and I wish I would have had a midwife there to take some of that pressure off. If my mom didn't know breathing patterns, we would have been screwed. In the heat of the moment neither of us remembered what we learned in Lamaze.

8. What did you feel were the positive benefits to your natural childbirth - were the benefits what you expected?
The amazing natural high you get for DAYS after! I had no "baby blues" or postpartum depression. I felt like a warrior woman and still feel that after accomplishing this, I can do anything!

9. Is natural childbirth something you recommend to other mothers, or something you'd do again?
Of course, it is an absolute life-changing experience! I think every mom should plan for any outcome and see how far she can take herself. I think everyone would be surprised at their reserve of power and ability!

10. What advice do you have for other mothers interested in natural childbirth?
Do what feels right to you, use your intuition! Study it out, explore lots of methods, and make sure you have a support system!

Contact Emily at her blog http://emilyframe.blogspot.com